Twas the day after Christmas

Twas the day after Christmas
and I got dressed in a hurry
my paws still tasted like peppermint
and I drank my coffee quite early

Out in the blue T-Bird
the window rolled down
I set my chin on the edge
and waited for smelly town

I sniffed and I snuffed
the exhaust hit me quite hard
and then my driver remembered
she's forgotten her credit card

We rushed back home
and I slurped up some water
I barked and I barked
my sweater had gotten much hotter

We whisked away once again
and arrived at the mall
where we drove in a maze
hoping for an empty stall

The labyrinth of cars
red blue and yellow
made humans scream out
and they weren'’t very mellow

IÂ’m pretty sure
Saint Nick has a new list to make
because those other drivers
were very naughty for goodness sake!

After an hour or so
I spotted an empty stall
and boy were we happy
to have come after all

She bundled me up
and I got my paws on the ground
Being careful to miss
the bubblegum stuck in a mound

The glass doors opened
as we approached with glee
I put my tail between my legs
there were so many people to see!

Tall men wearing baseball hats
and kids on leashes in tow
women decked in crystal brooches
aMuzakac curled my ears into a bow

From store to store we went
overwhelming to say the least
See's Candy chocolate truffles
to a warm cinnamon bun feast

I trotted from Nordstroms
and into the Apple store we did peek
a ride on the merry-go-round
more than 50% off sales we did seek

So many shopping bags
they all bumped into my head
and strollers, no more strollers,
I fear them with dread!

The escalator roared
and I shivered at the mountain of steel
Would my fur get caught?
Will I be trampled by another designer heel?

At last the gift cards
none were left in her pocket
so we grabbed a ride in the glass elevator
and shot down from the food court like a rocket

I made it to the car
and the windows stayed up
I snored on the passenger seat
because I'm a worn out pup

Arriving home
I ran to my bed and jumped inside,
grabbed the covers by my teeth
because until next Christmas
...this is where I'm going to hide!