Saturday, May 10, 2008

Saturday Means Sleeping In, Right?

My paws twitched as I frolicked in a meadow of skunk cabbage. Suddenly a buzzing sound could be heard far off beyond the line of pine trees. My paws left the dew grass, which tickled like little fairy fingers at my furry legs, and I felt the warmth of my cotton comforter under my belly.

One brown eye opened to a darkened bedroom. I lifted an ear to catch the direction of the annoying buzz which felt like needles piercing into my skull. The buzzing had a high pitched screech that pulsated until I almost let out a bark in frustration. What creature could possibly be making such an earth rattling sound before the sun has risen?

Oh yes, but of course, it is my arch enemy. I trotted over to my enemy, who sat perched on the night stand with a glowing grin of devil-red digital numbers. Sitting down, I kept watch over the vile creature until a hand reached out and made the thing finally fall back to sleep. At this point, my teeth bared at the rectangular thing and I growled under my breath.


The thing dared to make a sound once again! Before the hand could reach the demonic creature again, I opened my mouth and took hold of the boxy devil. I took off running, but I didn't anticipate the long tail which flapped behind like a limp hose. Somehow the tail had enough time to take hold of the wall once my teeth had grabbed hold.

Rounding the bed with a quick snap, the tail broke free and the creature fell to the wood floor in the hall where I skidded to a halt. The devil-red numbers no longer flickered and the creature gave no lasting gasp.

I dropped to the ground, head on paws, and blinked back tears. What had I done? Surely, this creature was just playing dead.
I reached out a paw and nudged the boxy thing. No movement. The tail didn't wiggle. The buzzing sound did not resume.

I waited until the sun cast rays across the floor planks and a hand reached down to pat my head.

"What's this? she said.

I looked up at her, unable to answer with anything but my downcast eyes. With that, she picked up the creature and walked it back to it's resting place on the night stand. I trotted behind and sat while she placed the creature upright and stuck the tail in the wall. My eyes widened at the sight of flickering boxy red numbers. Alive! I hadn't killed the poor thing.

Fast forward to this morning. I awoke to a horrible sound. I stretched my back legs, snarled at the dark skies outside and walked over to the creature. Blinking innocently, the creature buzzed once more before I reach out and patted the thing on it's plastic head like I had seen done before. Now comforted, the creature quieted and went back to sleep.

However, If the creature doesn't learn about Saturday soon, I'm betting a couple more trips to the hall will do the trick. And if all else fails, there's always the backyard vegetable garden. A little blue tail-free buzzer took a one-way trip there awhile back. And the corn* has never tasted so delicious.

::Buzz:: at you later,
PJ the dog blogging dog :-)

(*For those Stephen King fans out there, the "corn" is a familiar reference. And yes, butter and a little salt, yum.)